Sunday, January 08, 2006

Who's On God's Shit List?

I saw several pundits suggest that nature should be Time Magazine's …uh? what? not person of the year. The Year of Nature? Time's newsmaker of the year? What in Time's dastardly liberal bias minds was the biggest news story of 2005. Anyway, nature should have been on the cover instead of the Gates and Bono according to some, and they have sufficient cause to make that claim.

Although the Indonesia tsunami was technically in 2004, the news of it was reported in 2005. When you add to that a major record for the number of hurricanes (Greek hurricanes even were threatening us.), one, Katrina, hitting a major American city, the earthquake in Pakistan, fires in Texas and Oklahoma, and flooding and landslides on the West Coast, this has been one big year for nature.

Even in this supposedly modern age, we had people claiming we were being punished by God for our misdeeds. Pat Robertson claimed Katrina was God's wrath against New Orleans and it sinful ways. Osama bin Laden said Katrina was Allah punishing America for its presents in Iraq. Pat Robertson and Osama bin Laden in agreement – go figure.

Wouldn't Osama's pronouncement have been more meaningful if the Katrina had come ashore near Washington D.C. or Crawford, Texas, or even Chicago, home of the Neocon philosophy? God just doesn't comply with His self-chosen representatives here on earth.

If I follow Osama's logic, then the earthquake in Pakistan must have been Allah's dissatisfactions with that region for hiding Osama. Allah is not happy with you Osama – no 40 virgins for you – something less either in body count or level of virginity.

Oh, and Pat, since standing in self-righteous judgment of another person has to be the greatest of sins (Isn't that what they were doing when they crucified your religion’s Founder?), then the divinely generated hurricane should of come ashore in the Carolinas where you are? The 700 mph club should be coming you way, taking donations.

It does not take one of these religious wonks to come up with a sanctimonious reason to punish the West Cost – especially California. The Left Coast is on everybody's shit list.
I would have thought in this nature's wrath theme year, the great earthquake we are all expecting and waiting for would have occurred, but maybe the rain and flooding was a cleanings wrathful statement.

I'm not sure who was being punished in the case of the tsunami in Indonesia or why. Osama and his partner in holier than thou judgments, Pat, offered no proclamations from their mount. There just was no way to condemn Americans in that natural disaster. Maybe God did not want those people to live in a paradise without knowing what hell is.

Another reason for God’s wrath gone missing is the naturally occurring brush fires in the Okalahoma and east Texas. If its God’s measure for supporting and voting for Bush, they most of the country’s interior would have gone up. I must wait guidance from those more versed in such proclamations such as comes from the Pat and Osama show.